"I'm Breakin' Down...Dooooowwwwwwwn....Dowwwwwn!"

I dreaded today's reahearsal all week. Today was the day that we did "The Fall of the House of Usher" for the Artistic Director/Writer/Creator etc...(all the same woman mind you). I am not afraid of her by any means--in fact I really like her but the fact that this piece is completely her creation is a bit daunting. The whole week was leading up to this for me even though I have another day of rehearsal tomorrow...Didn't matter--today's rehearsal was what counted.

Of course we all built this up to be WAY more than it ended up being. At first it was a bit trying and a little terrifying but as the day went on we (the actors) built a great relationship with the Artistic Director. After I let down my guard and also let go of my fear of being wrong (which is saying a lot for me) I grew into the part of the "Narrator".

We had a bit of a mental laughing breakdown in the middle of rehearsal (we being all us actors AND the Artistic Director). I was so concerned that I was going to fuck up "her baby" (as it had been called) that I could not for the life of me do something as simple as pick up a cup at the right time. After about oh...5 tries we started laughing (which I NEVER thought would happen at this specific rehearsal) to the point that she was crying. It was a moment of sheer brilliance which made our day so much better from then on. It was like an ice breaker. Once we established that we were all HUMAN there, everything came a lot easier to me/us.

We worked very hard for the rest of the time at perfecting the specific style of the show but also learning how to incorporate actual acting into it. We found moments that I can see getting to the point of being actual acting instead of puppetry.

I left rehearsal today feeling like I had accomplished something and also that we had all come to an understanding that things aren't as hard as they seem.

We ended rehearsal with the ABSURDLY AMAZING opening music for the show...(insert sound clip here...if ONLY you could hear this shit...), danced around the room forgetting anything that stressed us or made us upset and revelled in the fact that we laughed our asses off WITH the Artistic Director on the day that we had dreaded all week. We also forgot about how a certain cast member and myself had been having small, kind of psychotic breakdowns at points (no names mentioned...yet) and realized that it is up to us to keep each other in check!

I look forward to keeping this sort of free-sprited, happy, playful attitude for the next four months! Hopefully it will be something that stays throughout the tour and afterwards as well...We shall see...Here's to hopin'!
:)

Again...with a smile I say goodnight...and DAMNIT I don't care how stupid it sounds!

PEACE

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